Madonna & A-Rod supposedly caught on camera

Some dude is claiming he has hidden camera footage of Madonna and A-Rod in a Manhattan apartment having, what can only be described as, the grossest sex of all time. He’s demanding a ton of cash for the video and Madonna’s lawyers are aware of the guy’s claims. The Daily Star reports:

In a series of emails fired off to media outlets, he alleged the footage was shot two months ago in an apartment owned by a pal of Madonna she knows through her devotion to the Kabbalah religion.
The video man – who is also a friend of the apartment owner – claimed he found out and secretly installed a hidden camera in the living room with the lens pointed at the sofa.

Shit, I’ll buy them just to throw them down the garbage disposal. I don’t want any of this footage to get sent my way and I accidentally watch it. Like I want my face melted off by the Pharaoh’s curse that comes from looking at Madonna’s vagina. Seriously.

Thanks to KD who once punched a Sphinx.

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Gabrielle Reece is still hot, also wearing a bikini

Sports model Gabrielle Reece is seen here vacationing in St. Tropez, France with husband surf guru Laird John Hamilton. I can tell Gabrielle just had a baby - and not because she’s holding one. (Okay, that helped.) In the meantime, ladies, if you want an idea of how what I like look like, I’m built exactly like Laird here. Except more buff and Tiffany jewelry shoots out of my pecs.

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Natalie Portman stars in boyfriend's crazy-ass video

Natalie Portman plays a Bollywood princess in the video for her boyfriend Devendra Banhart’s new single “Carmensita.” WARNING: I hope you like pubes and talks of “sacred teats.” That said, this thing kicks the shit out of the Star Wars prequels, but then again, pretty much 99% of YouTube does. With the exception of Tron Guy. Just kidding! That dude is Jesus.

Thanks to Bre for the video which has me convinced I accidentally put mescaline in my coffee again.

Video after the jump.

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Eritrea dismissive of Beshir arrest warrant (AFP)

AFP - Eritrea dismissed Tuesday as an “insult” a bid to put Sudan’s President Omar al-Beshir on trial for war crimes in Darfur and said the move must be rejected.

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'Batman' star Bale arrested for attacking mother and sister (AFP)

AFP - Hollywood actor Christian Bale, star of the new Batman film “The Dark Knight”, was arrested over allegations he attacked his mother and sister, police said Tuesday.

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UPDATE: Christian Bale arrested for allegedly assaulting his mother

Christian Bale was picked up by Scotland Yard this morning after his mother and sister claimed he assaulted them in his London hotel room Sunday night. Police didn’t arrest Christian for questioning yesterday because of The Dark Knight premiere. Also, he’s not considered a flight risk (Really? Batman?) and the cops don’t quite believe the seriousness of the allegations, according to The Sun:

A source said: “It was a very difficult situation but it would have been wrong to have wrecked the premiere over a complaint which we don’t yet know is founded in truth.”

It’s a probably a simple matter of Christian wanting to sleep in his cape, but his mom wouldn’t let him. So he hung her from the balcony by her ankle and left a note for Commissioner Gordon. Ha ha! Kids.

UPDATE: TMZ is reporting the alleged assault was most likely verbal which apparently you can get arrested for in England. Ah, those wacky Brits. Christian Bale has already been released and his reps issued the following statement: “Mr. Bale, who denies the allegation, co-operated throughout, gave his account in full of the events in question and has left the station without any charge being made against him by the police. At this time, there will be no further comment by Mr. Bale.”

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Ryan Block steps down as the editor of Engadget

Ryan Block steps down as the editor of Engadget to start his own company. And starting in late August will be replaced by Josh Topolsky. Block will still have a role at Engadget as editor-at-large in more of an advisory role. Good luck to Ryan and his new company.

via Engadget

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Kim Kardashian really is working out (Or doing a convincing job pretending to be)

Kim Kardashian really is working on her figure like her mom, Reggie Bush and the entire Internet wants. Then again she’s a Kardashian, so this is most likely an elaborate ruse. She probably changed/crowbarred herself into workout clothes once she saw the paps camped outside of Super Buffet. Fortunately, her family invested in a Jaws of Life once the girls hit puberty. Don’t worry, Kim. I know you’ve lost a lot of circulation, but you’ll be home soon and out of those clothes. Oh, no she’s fading. Quick, there’s a road crew! Maybe they have an acetylene torch. STAY WITH ME, KIM! We’ll get those pants off somehow. Is there a chainsaw store nearby?

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Christian Bale arrested for allegedly assaulting his mother

Christian Bale was picked up by Scotland Yard this morning after his mother and sister claimed he assaulted them in his London hotel room Sunday night. Police didn’t arrest Christian for questioning yesterday because of The Dark Knight premiere. Also, he’s not considered a flight risk (Really? Batman?) and the cops don’t quite believe the seriousness of the allegations, according to The Sun:

A source said: “It was a very difficult situation but it would have been wrong to have wrecked the premiere over a complaint which we don’t yet know is founded in truth.”

It’s a probably a simple matter of Christian wanting to sleep in his cape, but his mom wouldn’t let him. So he hung her from the balcony by her ankle and left a note for Commissioner Gordon. Ha ha! Kids.

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Heidi & Spencer are going to Iraq

At long last, my dream of Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt having a three-way with an IED is about to come true. America’s favorite assbag couple are heading to the Middle East to support the troops/pose on a tank for this year’s Christmas card. Spencer tells Extra their expedition is supposedly being aided by John McCain’s daughter Meghan who had lunch with Heidi last week. I’m thinking Heidi got confused when Meghan said “I would give my left tit to send you to Iraq.” True story:

“It’s very important to me and important to Spencer to support the troops and go over there. She’s very sweet. I think Meghan McCain is helping organize Heidi and our Iraq trip. Her dad definitely has some pull with the military. I think she’s going to put that together for us.”

If Barbie and Ken’s Gay Brother are really getting shipped overseas, I gotta hand it to the Republicans: Well played. Up until this moment I wouldn’t have voted for John McCain if you put a gun to my head. But now….

*I’m all about supporting the troops, but if you believe for one second these two are being altruistic and not out for self-promotion, congratulations! You’re legally retarded.

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